“I can’t communicate with my child” — this is a common struggle for parents whose kids have reached a certain age (you know it when you’re in it). Communication issues can be rooted in many different things, but sometimes it has to do with personality types.

Depth psychologists divide personality types into eight categories — which means the chances are good you have a different personality type than your child. By observing how your child responds to the world, you’ll learn how best to communicate with your kid. And certain behaviors that may concern you as a parent may be nothing more than how your child is hard-wired typologically.

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Dr. Billie Blair is an organizational psychologist and president and CEO of Los Angeles-based Change Strategists Inc. He helped categorize the eight types of personalities:

1.) Extraverted sensing types are in touch with the larger environment around them, “and tend to make decisions on spur-of-the-moment sensory experiences,” he said.

So if you’ve seen your child appear to gather data as he touches, sees, hears, tastes, and smells things and then rush to a decision, you may have an extraverted sensing child. Your child may turn out to be an excellent driver, naturally adept at sports, and unable to sit still for very long. Actors and musicians are often of this type.

2.) This contrasts with the introverted sensing type, who “will seek cues from the larger environment but not act on them overtly,” according to Blair. In this case, your child is more likely to take in that sensory data and reflect on it, process it, and compare it to historical data he’s collected. Your child may do very well comparing and contrasting things, and thus making increasingly aware decisions and altering behavior to compare with this new information. The child may be very detail-oriented and have a great memory focused on details. The best investors and visionaries like Jeff Bezos of Amazon and top sports athletes are great examples.

If the introverted intuition type of child says, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” pay attention.

3.) Now we come to the extraverted intuition type, “who puts intuitions to work as he comes into contact with his environments,” said Blair. If your child seems excited by new things, outwardly and proactively examines these things and finds patterns in them from an objective standpoint, you probably have an extraverted intuitive. This is the child who is always looking for motive and asking why someone is doing something. They look for connections, so they may excel at mysteries. Benjamin Franklin is a solid example, and Julian Assange of WikiLeaks has demonstrated an ability to draw connections from massive amounts of data.

4.) Blair describes the introverted intuition type as “arranging interactions when they have them, in consonance with their intuition,” If you’ve ever been creeped out by someone because they seem clairvoyant, you’ve probably met an introverted intuitive. Children like this just seem to have a knack for understanding what will come from something without any external data. They can interpret symbols, and envision how someone or something may respond to stimuli. This is the Merlin or Gandalf of the family. These people seem to have wisdom beyond their years. This child may seem particularly sensitive, as everything is reflected internally. If they ever say, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” pay attention.

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5.) Extraverted thinking types are similar to extraverted sensing types, but they are more likely to process their sensory data using reason and logic. They’re great organizers. They think ahead to determine consequences. Your child may be great at making educated guesses, setting out plans, and determining if something is working or not. This will be the child who seems prepared for anything. He’s the one who packs the mosquito repellent for a hike. These kids make great leaders, judges, and CEOs.

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6.) Blair describes introverted thinking types as being the proverbial “private, contemplative” person. This is the child many parents may worry about. He or she seems quiet or shy. These kids seem to “be in their own world.” That’s because they are. They are mulling things over, considering them, processing them, trying to determine the best way to approach something or to solve problems. They may even seem cold and unfeeling — but they just see the world more objectively.

7.) Extraverted feeling people make it clear exactly how they feel pretty much all the time. Blair describes them as the proverbial “extraverted personalities.” This can be great if you’re the parent because your child isn’t likely to hide much from you. When these kids are sad or angry or happy, you will know it. It can be a lot to handle, so your listening skills need to be at their best. You’ll find your child adapts very well to social situations. On the other hand, when all is quiet at night, you may find your child sad or even nervous. With the crowds gone and the emotion quieted, he may feel a little adrift.

Resist the temptation to fix things or make them feel better. Let your child handle it.

8.) Introverted feeling types are those who have still waters that run deep. They are the ones who most regard as very sensitive, who may even avoid or run from personal contact, according to Blair, because “they read into more of what they feel than objectively exists.” They may feel rebuked when a concrete thinker merely tries to show them a different way of solving a problem. They keep their cards close to their chest. These are the children who may also worry you, because they may appear reluctant to share much of anything — much less feelings. These are the children to bond with over quiet activities, like art or reading. Gradually, once they know their feelings are being seen and heard, they are more likely to open up to you.

So how do you communicate effectively once you peg your children’s possible personality type? First, put yourself into their mindset. How would you react to something if you were that type of child?

For example, if your child has just experienced something new and seems quiet or upset at it, knowing he’s an introverted sensing type will help you to relate by focusing on, and contextualizing, those sensory elements. “That haunted house had a funny smell, didn’t it? The red eyes of the monster were bright and scary, huh?”

An introverted feeling child may have frequent stomach aches — that are not caused by a dietary issue — as he tries to process complex feelings. Talking about those feelings will get you to the bottom of what’s going on.

Related: Are You Really Listening to Your Kid?

Second, have patience, particularly with introverts and thinkers. These kids are trying to navigate an external world when their skills are directed toward their interior world.  Sometimes, just sitting with them, playing cards, spending time, and talking about things from their perspective when you were a kid will help them to process things.

Third, sometimes silence is golden. Extraverted feelers, for example, may share all kinds of emotions and tears and anger. Resist the temptation to fix things or make them feel better. Let it all come out. You may discover that all your child needed to do was let it all out.

Finally, remember that communication is a never-ending process. You will be out of synch with your child on occasion. It’s OK. It’s part of a process that continues to develop over time. What matters is that you are there for your children.