Politics

California Proposes Students Worship Flying Snake God

Nope, not making it up.

Image Credit: Shutterstock

We have mentioned in this space how things in this era of social and political controversy seem to be getting surreal. In more proof of that, in a story that the Babylon Bee would find too wild to fabricate, a major state Department of Education currently proposes their students worship a plethora of bloodthirsty Aztec gods whose adherents displayed a quirky penchant for human sacrifice. Included in that list of divinities is Quetzalcoatl, a flying snake with a very bad temperament.

As someone of Colombian heritage, I would normally dismiss these as low rent Aztec deities compared to the relatively elegant elective neurosurgery-loving South American winged reptile gods. But alas, the cheap Aztec knockoffs have invaded, of course, California.

Their Department of Education has proposed an ethnic studies “model curriculum” that includes chanting the names of Aztec gods in grade schools. Yup, schools your kids attend. That is, if you happen to live in California and are thus coited for a lot more reasons than merely that.

In Aztec mythology, Tezkatlipoka is the brother of Quetzalcoatl, Huizilopochtli and Xipe Totec — all of whom are somewhere invoked in the entire chant. Included in the draft curriculum is a chant,  based on “In Lak Ech,” which is maniacally intoned before chanting the name of the Aztec god Tezkatlipoka. The text then reads: “Seeking the roots of the truth, seeking the truth of the roots, elders and us youth, critical thinking through.” Apparently this avian Moloch needs a lesson or two in English grammar and punctuation.

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It adds: “Tezkatlipoka, Tezkatlipoka, x2 smoking mirror, self-reflection Tezkatlipoka.” Tezkatlipoka is the name of rather playful Aztec god that was honored with tons of human sacrifices. An impersonator of Tezkatlipoka would be “honored” with his heart removed,  while he was still alive and watched, to appease the mischievous deity. Bad luck for the impersonator. But he was given a half day off of working the silver mines before the event. So there’s that.

Another portion reads, “pulsating creation huitzilopochtli cause like sunlight, the light inside of us, in will to action’s what brings… Xipe Totek, Xipe Totek, x2 transformation, liberation, education, emancipation. imagination revitalization, liberation, transformation, decolonization, liberation, education, emancipation, changin’ our situation in this human transformation.” Ancient snake gods seem to favor rhyming Bolshevik gibberish. What a coincidence!

According to the California educrats who made up this nonsense, the guiding principles include, “celebrate and honor native people/s of the land and communities of black indigenous people of color.” Another guiding principle read: “Center and place high value on the pre-colonial, ancestral knowledge, narratives, and communal experiences of native people/s and people of color and groups that are typically marginalized in society.” Aztec affirmative action? Well, we can put it in the next Covid Relief bill.

Williamson Evers, former assistant secretary at the U.S. Department of Education, told media that this California curriculum advocated a “neo-racist ideology.”

“They’re denying that the principles of America’s founding — all men are created equal, they’re endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights and so forth — that these principles can, through time, bring about human rights for all,” Evers said Wednesday. Yup, but that won’t matter to California educrats. They’ll just take a third hit of peyote and talk to Quetzalcoatl about it.

David Kamioner
meet the author

David Kamioner is a veteran of U.S. Army Intelligence and an honors graduate of the University of Maryland's European Division. He also served with the Pershing Nuclear Brigade and the First Infantry Division. Subsequent to that he worked for two decades as a political consultant, was part of the American Red Cross Hurricane Katrina disaster relief effort in Louisiana, ran a homeless shelter for veterans in Philadelphia, and taught as a college instructor. He serves as a Contributing Editor for LifeZette.

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