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The Tinder Tales

Ups and downs of millennial dating

“So what are you looking for on Tinder?” John messaged after exchanging a brief greeting.

And that is the question. What is an entire generation of millennials looking for on these dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge and a throng of others?

Most users know that common query, often the first question when one swipes right, means what type of relationship are you looking for — something casual, or just fun, or long-term and serious?

With more than 50 million users, Tinder has become a common way to meet people.

“I use (Tinder) a lot when I’m bored,” said one user who asked that his name not be used. “It’s fun to see who is around — and you never know what might happen.”

He’s not alone. It seems that many users choose to swipe because they are bored or looking just out of  curiosity.

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With more than 50 million users, Tinder has become a common way to meet people. But there are surveys that show a staggering number of Tinder users are, in fact, not single. A study done earlier this year by GlobalWebIndex claimed that 4 in 10 Tinder users are in a relationship of some kind, and 3 in 10 are married.

Many believe that apps like Tinder are just simply “hook-up” services, exploiting the already seemingly egotistical and depraved morality of the millennial generation. However, with more and more couples meeting online, the case for Tinder, and other apps like it, is becoming increasingly compelling.

These apps have us all talking, whether negatively or positively, and everyone has that friend of a friend who is marrying someone they met on Tinder.

But what are these apps really all about?

Apps like Tinder give people the opportunity to chat without consequences, leading to users doing and saying things they wouldn’t do publicly or say to someone’s face.

On Tinder, you can scroll through a few pictures of a potential date and read a short introduction before choosing to swipe right, if you find them attractive, or left, if you don’t. If two people both swipe right on each others’ pictures, they “match,” which allows them to message back and forth inside the app.

On Sept. 11, Tinder rolled out a new feature allowing users to swipe up — meaning they “super-like” them. Obviously, almost all of Tinder’s swiping left and right and up is based on pure attraction to the other person’s pictures — how they look.

Many in older generations shake their heads at millennials, especially when it comes to apps like this. In general, these dating apps have a negative side for young people. Apps like Tinder give people the opportunity to chat without consequences, leading to users doing and saying things they wouldn’t do publicly or say to someone’s face.

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Dr. Meg Meeker, who has written multiple books on parenting, echoed the reservations involving these apps.

“I have always told my patients they should never date someone who isn’t marriage material. I’ve listened to far too many teens and young adults who endured heartache because they got involved too fast too soon with the wrong person. Dating apps encourage this to happen.”

While many people misuse these apps, there still are success stories. It is possible to meet your future spouse on Tinder. But if you’re going to give it a go, first, be single, and second, don’t use one of these lame pick-up lines:

  1. “How are you, Tinderella?”
  2. “Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day!”
  3. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cutecumber.”
  4. “Thank God I’m wearing gloves, because you are too hot to handle.”
  5. “On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you tonight?”

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