Going Off the Grid

As I lugged my overpacked suitcase onto the curb and looked up at the 14 floors of the cruise ship looming above me, I felt overwhelmed.

Every other passenger standing there with me seemed in a hurry to clamber aboard, and everyone was holding boarding passes, passports, and texting on their cellphones. Though this was my first cruise, it didn’t take me long to figure out that I would have to turn off my cellphone soon. I sent my husband a last text, then did a “slide to power off.”

I sent my husband a last text, then did a “slide to power off.”

No phones, no texts, no emails, no battery chargers, no staring at a screen for five whole days. In other words: YOW!

On this particular cruise to Bermuda I was traveling with my mom, two sisters, four nieces and a nephew. It wasn’t too hard for us all to be “phoneless,” given the swimming pools, restaurants, shops, casinos and everything else from rock climbing to nightly shows to keep us busy. The first night, as I looked out at the vast Atlantic with no land in sight, my first thought was to call or text my husband.

I realized then I was going to have to wait until our return and tell him everything all at once. (Sort of like the “pre-text” days, when people had to cram together a beginning, middle and end.)

With no cells to communicate on the ship, we had brought sets of walkie-talkies so we would know what all the kids were up to and be able to reach them if needed. We used code names, messages were short and sweet, and we discovered that walkie talkies were a lot more fun! Eventually, though, the walkie-talkies were left behind in the cabin.

Things would just sort of work themselves out, we figured, without having to send messages about every little thing. I think we knew not much could go wrong with nine of us together on one big ship in the middle of the ocean, and guess what? Without cellphones or walkie-talkies and with just good old-fashioned talking, everything worked out just fine.

Things would just sort of work themselves out, we figured, without having to send messages about every little thing.

Meals were delightful. The nine of us encircled a table and had long conversations with full eye contact at breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day. There was never one reminder about putting down the cellphone because those devices were all in our cabins tucked away in suitcases and backpacks. It was so nice not having to compete with the silent voices that somehow become uninvited guests that interrupt us on little screens.

It was just the nine of us and no one else. Judging from the laughter and stories that were shared, I don’t think anyone missed having their phone one bit.

When we arrived in Bermuda we had to formulate a plan so we could all reconnect later at the end of the day. We talked to each other about where we all would be going and when we would meet. With no way to text each other or to call, that good old-fashioned talking once again worked just fine. We all went our different directions and returned to the ship all in one piece.

On day three of the cruise, I woke up early one morning and decided to take a walk to catch the sunrise. As I looked out at the vast ocean with no land in sight, I realized I was slowing down. The usual routine of making coffee first thing in the morning, checking my texts, getting behind the wheel of a car, and “going, going, going” all day had come to a halt.

The usual routine of making coffee first thing in the morning, checking my texts, getting behind the wheel of a car, and “going, going, going” all day had come to a halt.

This week I was having coffee made for me every morning, had no texts or emails to send or receive, had a captain navigating for me, and nowhere to go but here. I could actually hear myself breathing in and out. I was for the first time in a long time thinking about absolutely nothing. I think the term for this is “relaxed”! I decided right then and there that I did not miss my phone one bit.

The distractions of a cruise ship probably helped make going off the grid a bit easier, but I also think I was craving this break. I think maybe we all are, but just don’t know it. Someday I am sure there will be a bestseller called “Returning to the Lost Art of Conversation: A Ten-Step Guide on How to Break Your Cellphone Addiction.” It will most likely include instructions on how to take phone breaks, how to make eye contact, and how to have meaningful conversations again with other human beings.

In the meantime, we have to figure out how to do this on our own. Maybe just turning off my cellphone a few hours a day would be a start and then I could work up to one full day “off” on the weekend. I am thinking I might find it will make me a more decent human being.

As we arrived back at port, we had our last breakfast together and since we were back in the states, we realized we could all turn our cells on again. As I looked around the table I noticed that one of my nieces had her head down and was suddenly not talking and laughing with her cousins, as she had been throughout the cruise. She was back “on the grid.”

In that one moment all her mom had to do was to say her name and give her “the look.” My niece put her phone down and smiled. I think she realized it was sort of nice to be with us after all. That might have been one of my favorite moments on the cruise. Going off the grid can be a beautiful thing.

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