Beware of the Beard

Facial hair isn’t always the cleanest of trends.

Dr. Scott Jacobs, a Los Angeles emergency room doctor, says, “It’s a veritable cesspool. Facial hair can trap bacteria, spread germs and trigger infection.”

And as any lady who’s ever kissed a bearded beau before, that facial scruff can cause a wicked chin burn.

Still, beards continue to be the male accessory of the moment. Once simply thought of as the facial accouterments of rebellious types, the beard has gone mainstream.

Those big beards that people think are cool have more germs than a public toilet

— king banghard (@banghardd) May 24, 2015

Just scan any bar or boardroom and you’ll find alphas and hipsters sporting various versions of the beard: the stubble, the bushy, and the bedraggled.

But just how sanitary is this trend?

Back when beards were having a real moment in the 19th century, many men in the English countryside began growing them because some doctors of the day considered them a healthy line of first defense, follicular filters protecting the face, mouth, and throat from infection.

Today’s medical establishment may not agree with this creative, beard-as-facial-wetlands approach. Let’s face it, the beard is exposed to everything from food to saliva.

Today’s medical establishment may not agree with this creative, beard-as-facial-wetlands approach.

If the wearer grows weary of grooming the situation can get out of control quite quickly. Conventional wisdom would tell us that shorter, well-kept beards are cleaner than their longer, bushier brethren. Yet it isn’t about the length of the beard but the face it’s hanging on.

Jake Knibbs is a London hipster who has one of the fuller, instantly suspect beards, but he’s fastidious in his daily regimen. He allots himself the proper time to wash his beard before conditioning and combing it into a well-coiffed and hygienic facial attraction.

“It’s essential to wash and care for your beard every day,” Knibbs said.

“It’s essential to wash and care for your beard every day,” Knibbs said.

David Beckham is perhaps the most famous experimenter with facial hair, morphing from scraggly to bushy from month to month. But in a confession to James Corden of “The Late Late Show,” one half of America’s style couple said the other half wasn’t too keen on his Grizzly Adams look: “I was in Miami and Victoria actually saw the picture and was like, ‘There’s no way I’m kissing you unless you shave that off.’ I left it for a day, and I was like, ‘You know what, I’m going to have to do it.’”

https://twitter.com/sidwolfmasters/status/618896450546716672

And Beckham did, shaving that jungle down to a light pastureland, and insuring domestic tranquility. Maybe a few other of his bearded brethren should do the same.