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CIA Spending Too Much Time Braiding Their Hair And Painting Their Toenails

Has Langley become a Marxist Girls School?

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Those of us who spent time in the military sector of the intelligence community never quite trusted the Virginia farm boys over at CIA. It wasn’t just the Bay of Pigs, more fun with Castro, or 9-11, it is their civilian hubris. That kind of stuff, and Langley’s happy face analytical capabilities, makes my DIA pals guffaw with derisive laughter and shake their heads in comic disbelief at this latest CIA venture into woke absurdity. CIA seems more like a camp for wayward girls than an intelligence agency. Cal Thomas provides details.

Thomas: “The Central Intelligence Agency is always looking to recruit new agents and advertising is one way it has done so in the past. The difference this time is in a newly created series of recruitment videos that reflect the spirit of the age in which we live, rather than appealing to abilities and patriotism.

The videos seem to suggest that the super-secret agency has been infiltrated, not by spies from Russia, China, or Al Qaeda, but rather a subtler and nearly invisible enemy.

That would be the infiltration by woke liberals, whose primary goal appears to be the undermining of every tradition and institution — from Disneyland’s Snow White ride (the famous kiss scene by the Prince has been deemed sexually aggressive because Ms. White is unconscious and cannot give consent, so it will be re-imagined) — to America’s foremost intelligence agency.

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The latest CIA video features a Latina officer who identifies as a ‘cisgender millennial.’ Even the word ‘cisgender’ is so new that my spellcheck does not (yet) recognize it. The video is part of a new series called ‘Humans of CIA’ designed to attract a more ‘diverse pool of candidates.’

From the script: ‘I am a woman of color. I am a mom. I am a cisgender millennial who has been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. I am intersectional, but my existence is not a box-checking exercise.’ Really? What else could it be?

WebMD defines anxiety disorders: “They’re a group of mental illnesses that cause constant and overwhelming anxiety and fear. The excessive anxiety can make you avoid work, school, family get-togethers, and other social situations that might trigger or worsen your symptoms.” Forget the other stuff. Why would the CIA be fine with an agent suffering from such a malady?

Some conservatives immediately began mocking the video. Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas, said: ‘If you’re a Chinese communist, or an Iranian mullah, or Kim Jong-un … would this scare you? We’ve come a long way from Jason Bourne,’ a reference to the star of the spy movies, not to mention the real-life drama of Virginia Hall, whose World War II exploits for British, French and American intelligence are chronicled in a book by Sonia Purnell entitled ‘A Woman of No Importance.’

The Biden administration is weakening America from inside out, especially by ignoring the crisis at our southern border. Wokeness is spreading at least as fast COVID-19 ever could. Unlike the virus, there is no vaccination for this moral and intellectual pandemic. The CIA has had problems in its past, but none as serious as this. If they continue to succumb to wokeness, the ‘I’ in its acronym will stand for insanity.”

David Kamioner
meet the author

David Kamioner is a veteran of U.S. Army Intelligence and an honors graduate of the University of Maryland's European Division. He also served with the Pershing Nuclear Brigade and the First Infantry Division. Subsequent to that he worked for two decades as a political consultant, was part of the American Red Cross Hurricane Katrina disaster relief effort in Louisiana, ran a homeless shelter for veterans in Philadelphia, and taught as a college instructor. He serves as a Contributing Editor for LifeZette.

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