‘Generation Z’ Is in Trouble: Here’s How to Fix It

Most college applicants aren’t asked to meet for an interview — there are simply not enough college admissions officers and active alumni to meet with the tens of thousands who apply. While this may seem like a drawback to high school seniors — it might be a blessing for many.

This generation, born between 1996 and 2010 and often known as Generation Z, can be notoriously self-involved. That quality hardly plays well in interviews.

Gen Z-ers are likely to be impatient and have a short attention span.

Generation Z members are digital natives with “social technology embedded deep within all aspects of life,” according to a report on CBS News. Growing up with Twitter, Snapchat, and Instagram has made them very aware of their personal brand, so much so that many young people place greater value on the virtual world than on the real one.

Think these statements are too blunt? Consider the fragmentation of their attention span and their belief that there is always something better elsewhere — a perpetual “fear of missing out” (FOMO) syndrome. As a result, they engage less with others — and others expect less from them in return.

Detailed research supports the belief that Gen Z could be the most narcissist generation ever. Professor Jean Twenge of San Diego State University did a study in 2014 that revealed 18- and 19-year-olds are much more narcissistic than were teens of previous generations. Twenge also worked with nationally recognized narcissism expert W. Keith Campbell, and together they documented their findings in the book “The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement.” The tool they used to assess their subjects is the Narcissistic Personality Inventory, created in 1979.

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“Somebody high in self-esteem values individual achievement, but they also value their relationships and caring for others,” Twenge told Australia’s ABC.net of her findings. “Narcissists are missing that piece about valuing, caring and their relationships, so they tend to lack empathy — they have poor relationship skills. That’s one of the biggest differences. Those communal and caring traits tend to be high in most people with self-esteem but not among those who are high in narcissism.”

As evidence of a more narcissistic society, Campbell and Twenge observed that plastic surgery rates in the U.S. have gone through the roof since the late 1990s, according to ABC.net. There is also a greater drive to be unique, to stand out rather than fit in. This is evident in the names people give their children. Looking at the Social Security Administration database of all American names going back to the 1800s, they found that in recent decades, parents have been much more likely to give their kids unique names.

Interestingly, narcissists tend to have more friends on Facebook. “What that means is the average person you’re connected with on Facebook is probably a little more narcissistic than the average person you’re connected with in real life, because narcissists are skilled at those online connections,” said Twenge, who pointed to numerous studies on this correlation.

Gen Z-ers are also likely to be impatient and have a short attention span because they grew up alongside technology. As a result, many members of Gen Z interview poorly. And their parents are well aware of this.

Related: Hey, Millennials, You’ve Got Weaknesses — Fix ‘Em

Many parents overcompensate for their children’s self-involvement by programming them with responses. “Most students are good at communicating their ‘set pieces,’ but few are able to engage fully in the give and take of true conversation,” one Duke University alumni interviewer told LifeZette.

It is very difficult to find a Gen Z-er who is “present” enough in the moment to demonstrate the quality of being authentically “there.” As the Duke interviewer noted, “I have had only three such interactions in the past eight years.”

In the workplace, Gen Z-ers are expected to give much more than they will receive, but having been served their whole lives by parents, teachers, and coaches — they struggle.

Although parents compensate for this by overpreparing their child for college interviews, they frequently overlook the soft skills. A Westchester County, New York, alumni interviewer told LifeZette, “Many lack the basic greeting skills: Physically approach the person, put out a hand, firmly shake while maintaining eye contact.” And following the interview, most Gen Z-ers make the mistake of neglecting to write a thank-you note.

Rather than risk embarrassment, many parents urge their child to avoid the college interview altogether. They rationalize it provides little upside, so why risk a potential flop? But they are doing their child a great disservice by not having him or her work on this area of weakness.

As Gen Z-ers begin to enter the workforce, their lack of personal engagement has led to concern from employers. One Westchester County media executive has seen significant changes in the job applicant pool in recent years: “[Gen Z-ers] approach the [hiring] process as if we would be lucky to have them as part of our team. Their questions are primarily self-serving.”

In the workplace, Gen Z-ers are expected to give much more than they will receive, but having been served their whole lives by parents, teachers, and coaches — they struggle to accept the transition to active contributor. “The biggest thing I see is they don’t do their homework on the company,” said one New York City managing partner. “They don’t connect during the interview, and they don’t follow up properly.”

Related: Etiquette Excellence for Kids

However — not all is lost here. Those who shine come to the interview well prepared and enthusiastic — something parents can encourage early in a child’s college or job application process. Beyond the company website, some Gen Z-ers use The Muse and Glassdoor to develop a stronger understanding of the business they’re trying to join, according to Heidi Ravis, a Westchester career counselor. A successful Gen Z-er is able “to deliver a clear message of why he is the best candidate,” added the media executive.

Practical Solutions to These Problems
There are many ways these young people can improve on these perceived areas of weakness. Gen Z has seen firsthand the power of social media to destroy reputations and careers — so they tend to be very cautious. This is a good thing in many ways. However, such caution can lead to even more self-involvement if they ruminate over their every (virtual) move.

Here are positive steps they can take and information they can use:

1.) Improvisational skills are worth improving. Taking an improv class allows Gen Z-ers to learn to be more “in the moment” and react more effectively to surprises. Improv also helps students become more active and patient listeners. But most importantly, it allows Gen Z-ers to take risks in a safe environment — and as they extend their comfort zones, they’ll move away from their over-reliance on the virtual world.

2.) Summer work is a great way for them to enrich their lives. Those who work as lifeguards and busboys — free of their smartphones — tend to see the nuances of social interaction. Many develop a greater sense of empathy as they begin to understand the various social hierarchies around them.

3.) Participating in community service is a terrific option for Gen Z-ers. By volunteering at a senior citizen center, for example, members of this generation get to hear poignant stories and understand the importance of face-to-face interaction.

As they break free of their virtual shells, these young people can start to connect more deeply and organically to others around them — and make a significant impact in their college years and beyond. Learning face-to-face skills can make the difference between getting into a great college and landing that great first job — and keeping it.

Daniel Riseman, founder of Riseman Educational Consulting in Irvington, New York, has been counseling students and working with families for 16 years.