Apple’s Big Announcements

Carpool Karaoke, Super Mario, the iPhone 7 — and freaky AirPods

It’s an annual fall tradition, like the changing colors of leaves and the arrival of pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks.

On Tuesday, Apple unveiled some hot new goodies for its loyal consumers, including the new iPhone 7, a Super Mario game, and updates to Apple Watch.

“No phone jack in a phone is the equivalent to giving a child a Yoo-hoo with no straw.”

But causing the biggest buzz of all: AirPods. Because the new phone doesn’t have a headphone jack, users will have to wear AirPods, little individual ear bud devices.

The event was held at the  Bill Graham Civic Auditorium in San Francisco and all the usual tech bloggers were out in force, live-blogging the event.

There were jokes and wisecracks, along with excitement over the new products — which this time around seemed to really include some serious upgrades.

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Here are some of the key takeaways — and some of the best responses:

You cannot escape Carpool Karaoke.
The event kicked off with a video of Apple Chief Executive Tim Cook doing “Carpool Karaoke” with “Late Late Show” host James Corden.

The two sang a One Republic song and then were joined by Pharrell Williams, who hopped in the back seat for a rendition of “Sweet Home Alabama.”

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It made sense for Cook to do Carpool Karaoke because Apple Music bought an unscripted TV series based on the skit in July. The segments have been wildly popular and have included dozens of famous people sitting in Corden’s car singing hit songs.

Every time someone sings with Corden, it spurs music sales — making it a natural for Apple Music. Apple Music will distribute it to its 17 million subscribers in 100 countries worldwide.

You can drop it in the sink.
The new iPhone 7 can get wet. It’s water-resistant.

In addition to that, the camera has been updated in big ways, and the phone will feature stereo speakers, which means you’ll be saying good-bye to the headphone jack and hello to Apple AirPods, $159 cord-free ear buds with 24 hours of battery life. Beats is launching a line of headphones running the same chips as the AirPods.

“No phone jack in a phone is the equivalent to giving a child a Yoo-hoo with no straw,” tweeted actor Josh Gad.

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And speaking of battery life, you can expect about two hours more of battery life with the 7 than on your 6S.

The phone comes in black, gold, rose gold, and silver and will be available Sept. 16. Price for the 7 is $649 — for the 7S, $769.

You will lose your AirPods.
Jokes flew on Twitter about people having already lost their AirPods and the things haven’t even hit the market. There were tweets about the beach being littered with lost AirPods and memes of Ken Jeong looking for his tiny AirPods.

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“Probably should just be called Air Lost,” tweeted one person.

You need to exercise more.
That’s how you’ll feel seeing the new Apple Watch. The company is partnering with Nike for a special runners’ version. It will feature a GPS to help you stay on the correct path, and it will be “swim proof.” It’s faster, twice as powerful, and brighter.

You kids will grow up learning code.
Apple is donating hardware to more than 4,500 teachers and iPads to more than 50,000 students, and is making available a program called Everyone Can Code.

And now that you’ve conquered ‘Pokemon Go’ … 
Apple announced it’s bringing out a “Super Mario Run” game to movies devices and “Pokemon Go” to Apple Watch. Look for Mario to start running on iOS around the holidays.

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