Mila Kunis Won’t Spoil Her Kids

Actress Mila Kunis and her husband, Ashton Kutcher, both grew up poor and consider themselves to be self-made. And they are determined not to have spoiled children themselves.

“It’s a matter of teaching them from a very early age that, you know, ‘Mommy and Daddy may have a dollar, but you’re poor,'” Kunis recently told an Australian podcast. “‘You are very poor. You have nothing. Mommy and Daddy have a bank account.'”

A child should not claim de facto credit for someone else’s fortune.

Kunis has a point. Technically, children have done nothing, own nothing, won no awards, and pursued no real endeavors. To paraphrase President Obama, they didn’t build that — their parents did.

Wealthy children may live in an expensive house, go to the best schools, and wear the best clothes, but it was their parents, not them, who earned those things.

The beauty of the American spirit is that we are self-made people and we don’t bow to the bloodline obligation of rewarding those who reached the mother’s egg fastest. We fought a revolution for the chance to be a part of the opportunity to thrive without being handicapped by an archaic caste system of rules and endogamy.

So far in our American history, each generation has managed to surpass the previous one in income, success, and mobility. We will see the end of this great republic if generations begin to get the idea that they can dine out on the fruits of another generation without contributing back.

Kutcher and Kunis are proof that a boy from Iowa and a girl from the former Soviet Union can find success and love in the land of the free. And one of the greatest gifts they can pass on to their children is understanding the joy of success is about wanting things and striving for them rather than have everything handed to them. It is, in fact, the striving — not the things — that brings the satisfaction.

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A child should not claim de facto credit for someone else’s fortune. We are born without clothes on our back and cannot truly take credit for our placement in this world until we’ve paved our own way. That is what being an American is all about.

Some other Hollywood parents strike the balance of toughness and mentorship.

Legendary director and actor Clint Eastwood has made clear to his son, Scott, that Scott will work his way up through Hollywood — but it won’t be handed to him.

In a recent Esquire magazine interview, Clint said he has not directed Scott in any of his major projects but suggests, “I’ll probably be begging him for one soon enough.”

Scott laughed, “Yeah, right.”

Related: Eastwood: “Everybody is boring”

The elder Eastwood has been supportive with advice but won’t do any favors. Instead, he’s encouraged Scott to go above and beyond in learning his craft.

“I don’t remember how old I was when you told me this, Dad. But you said, ‘As an actor, I never went back to my trailer. I always hung out on set and learned,'” Scott told Esquire. “That stuck with me. I’m on this ‘Fast and Furious’ movie right now, and everyone goes back to their trailer. I stick around and say, ‘Why you are setting up the shot like this?’ I want to learn.”

Kunis, Kutcher, and Eastwood aren’t the only Hollywood parents who teach responsibility — but not everyone in show biz has been so prudent.

David Beckham and his “Spice Girl” wife, Victoria Beckham, reportedly bought a $50,000 treehouse and a $187,000 playhouse for their kids to play in.

When North West, the child of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, turned one, Kim put on a massive birthday party. Called Kid-Chella, the party featured a tie-dye cake, a karaoke stage, and a Ferris wheel. North won’t remember her first birthday party, but no worries — the excess is unlikely to end.

In contrast to Eastwood’s no favors approach, Angelina Jolie found that her father Jon Voight’s help in getting into films, at the early age of seven, was overwhelming.

Jolie felt the media obsession and importance put on her opinions at an early age had not been “earned.”

“I wasn’t evolved yet,” Jolie told The Wall Street Journal.

There is nothing wrong with sharing your success with children, but it’s also important to remind them who owns that success. Children are sponges, and the sooner they understand the Kunis-Eastwood balance of career favors and financial expectations, the better off they will be.